Another PR Wall of Shame winner!

June 7, 2007
This came to me this morning...

[redacted] announces important breakthrough for the [redacted] market

[redacted] a leading manufacturer and supplier of high quality [redacted], announces the launch of [redacted], a significant breakthrough for the[redacted]market. [redacted]'s products are used by the pharmaceutical, food, and chemical and process industries as well as research centres. [redacted] is an easy-to-use platform and follows [redacted]'s 30 years' experience ...
This came to me this morning...

[redacted] announces important breakthrough for the [redacted] market

[redacted] a leading manufacturer and supplier of high quality [redacted], announces the launch of [redacted], a significant breakthrough for the[redacted]market. [redacted]'s products are used by the pharmaceutical, food, and chemical and process industries as well as research centres. [redacted] is an easy-to-use platform and follows [redacted]'s 30 years' experience in[redacted] control. Specifically designed for the [redacted] industry, it offers industrial power, reliability and expandability using standard controllers (PLC) and distributed control systems (DCS). As a result of [redacted] the scientist and engineering communities will enjoy a number of benefits including: intuitive navigation; a colour touch screen interface; options for [redacted] controls, pumps and sensors; the ability to use the same system to control [redacted], single-use [redacted] or [redacted] systems and impressively, the power to meet today's needs but with sufficient expandability to meet future needs. Benefits specific to engineers include: a choice of controllers including Siemens, Allen Bradley or Delta V; fieldbus technology; the power and reliably of an industrial controller; a design adhering to the S88 guidelines and open system architecture.   [redacted] commented, "[redacted] related issues such as high-throughput screening, scaling up, scaling down and PAT are no longer a trend, but a must in this arena. A Manufacturing Execution Systems (MES) involves managing engineering changes and tracing material for regulatory compliance, conforming to increasingly stringent quality standards, delivering on schedule despite shrinking lead times, and reducing costs. It is becoming increasingly important. Our [redacted] platform addresses these issues." This is what's wrong with this press release. Watch and learn, grasshopper!
First, the headline is misleading. There is no "significant breakthrough"-- there is only a new product announcement. Why don't you just say so? Second, there's just not a lot of description of what the product actually is. It also doesn't tell you what it does, either, does it? Third, last I looked, S88 was a standard not a set of guidelines. Either it adheres to the standard, and is amenable to testing to the standard, or it doesn't and you shouldn't claim that it does. My bet is that it is "S88 aware" which is the notional buzzword that people are using to claim S88 compliance without actually doing it. Fourth, I can use Siemens, Allen Bradley or Delta V controllers without this product, whatever it is. Fifth, yes, Mr. Company Executive, those issues are important. We're glad your platform addresses these issues, but for the sake of my digestion, please tell me how it addresses them, and why it does so in a better or different way than everybody else who already does this in the [redacted] market. And finally, if I get another press release from anybody who is "a leading manufacturer and supplier of high quality" widgets or software, I may lose my lunch. Come on, EVERYBODY is a leading manufacturer, and nobody makes junk, right? Be honest-- nobody ever heard of you before, and you are trying to make a market here... So, grasshopper, this is how to waste an editor's time...