Greg: In our time-proven tradition of subjecting everything to scrutiny and ridicule, where I am scrutiny and Stan is ridicule, we offer the following control myths.
Stan: This should take no time at all, or less, if you prefer.
Greg’s List of Control Myths
Stan: Don’t call me Shirley. “If you really want to save money on positioners, then don’t put them on any valves smaller than 3 in. For even more fun, forget about rotary valves with weird spring ranges such as; 7.5 to 21 psig. Then stand in the control room and guess what the valve is doing.”[
Pressure and temperature-compensated orifice flow measurements provide mass flow measurements. If your favorite vendors believe the composition in the pipeline is always exactly the composition stated in the process flow diagram and the equations are accurate for all operating conditions, then give them an achievement award for imaginative marketing.Stan’s List of Control Myths
interests in measuring mass flow, you probably slept through that class in instrument school. This is about the nicest thing that we could say about you and the vendor. (Please note: when Greg wants to get me really upset, he begins talking or writing about orifice plates and other differential flow measuring devices.)
Integrating your basic process controllers and the plant safety system can reduce costs by using the same hardware, configuration, and maintenance. Make sure management understands that it almost always takes more than two or three failures to produce a spectacular explosion, fire, or release of toxic materials.
Greg: From time to time, our column may have a quote from special guest(s). Last month it was Groucho Marx. This month, it’s Wally and the Beave from the classic TV sitcom, Leave it to Beaver.
This Month's Puzzler
A vortex meter was working fine during water batching of a new process area. Suddenly it begins reading very erratically. When the sensor voltage was displayed on an oscilloscope, it was a squiggly mess. What happened? Send an e-mail with your answer, questions, or comments to The Puzzler.
Wally: Any executive with half a brain would realize that without experienced control people, myths rule.
Beave: I hope it’s not the dumb half.
Greg: On a personal note, I was glad to hear that there is a Hell, Minnesota, which means I was correct last summer in noting that Austin was “hotter than Hell.” I plan to go there some day, so I can brag that I have been “to hell and back.” And, if I take an airport limo, aptly named “hand basket,” I also can say “I’m going to hell in a hand basket.”
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